coolDoubts about the lifted block.

Maybe this lift on my writers block wasn't such a good thing. If it sends me to writing poems like the one in my last post, poems that depress me, what good is it? I've always thought that the really depressing ones were some of the best, most heart felt, meaningful that I've ever read, but not when coming from my quill. Will some one please patch this hole in the dam that was holding it all back? It is pleasent to know that I can write, but not this. I use to peg myself as an always happy go lucky kinda guy. I've never really been depressed, and there is no record that I know of that it has been in my family. I do ejoy this outlet though. Online journel, let people read it,. I don't care. Give me your insight. I'm tired. I think I'll go to bed now. More on this as the story unfolds. Be well all, for tomorrow is a new day. Pay attention to the smallest of details. That's what makes this world worth while. Ejoy a walk in the park, or along a lake side. Feel the spring breeze as it whips through you hair. Smell the freshly cut grass, as the sun shines down on your faces. Blow some bubbles, and chase them with abandon. Ejoy yourself. Just enjoy. Good night all.

Don't ask because I don't know the answer.

I just had to write. I just looked back and realized that there is truly nothing that I have done with my life. The military is truly a drain. How I regret that decision.




Existence in the realm of empty,
The not, is where we feel,
or rather, not.
Darkness, this newness,
Like an unidentified sapling,
Name it, for it is new to me.
An uncomfortable numbness, envelopes,
As of nothing I've ever known.
It frightens us.
We are pilgrims in this place.
The old appears so distant,
Like a mirage.
Did it ever truly exist?
I believed so.
I'd like to think it did.
Pain, of what I cannot tell.
Where did it come from?
Where are we going?
I am lost, forgotten in this place.
An outsider in the land of the souless.
We cannot...I cannot.
End this, for it is unwelcome
in my mind.
How did it get here? When?
Has it been forever present,
yet I blind to it's torment?
Fly away beast of nothing.
You Blythe of cheer.
I shall exercise you,
Back to your abyss.
Be gone, I owe you nothing.
And deserve this, not.
Suddenly, away as quick as it appears.
What was this? This terror.
Rest me now, for I am weary.
Sleep, a cure for all.
Be well, and tomorrow,
Awake with fresh eyes for life.

Be affraid. Be very affraid.

Do I scare ya? I should...This says so.

You Are Scary

You even scare scary people sometimes!

How scary are you?

Oddness in my new found writing.

The odd thing about these new writing is, this is completely unfamiliar to me. When I use to write it would be rhythmic sonnet. Perfect form. I didn't do it on purpose most of the time, but when it was on purpose, it was much harder to do. Here is the third a final one from my watch. I was watching the lights blink in and out on the cranes that are like a billion feet tall.


Bright, fade, bright.
Light is as such.
Life like light,
Always flickering.
Never a beam of
Constant truth to behold.
This is the way,
Choose to accept,
And gain the wisdom
Of centuries of
continual thought.
For this is
the only constant,
In a world of
Flickering truths.

More from the from the writers block dam that burst.

This was a great thing that I could suddenly, miraculously write while I was standing watch on Sunday night. I like this one. I hope you all do too. And if you don't, feel free to tell me about it.


Standing, watching, waiting.
Waiting for anything.
Anything to pass the time.
Time that creeps along.
Along slowly as...
as the clouds on a windless day.
Day that I long to see.
See the sun rise to warm the air.
Air that seems stagnant & stale.
stale like a life of nothingness.
Nothingness that fills my thoughts.
Thoughts of days past.
Past my teens and beyond.
Beyond the point of knowing.
Knowing wrong from right.
Right into my innocence.
Innocence of my youth.
Youth that I have lost.
Lost never to be found.
Found here armed and standing.
Standing, watching, waiting.

Standing watch lifted my block.

So I write this post, not from in front of my computer, but in a small note pad. As I stand a not-so-vigilant watch on top of a barge in the middle of a shipyard. Don't worry, I don't have to be alert for this watch, only present. Shot gun slug about my shoulder, ammunition and radio safely secured to my guard belt. (I'm not even suppose to be on watch today!)
So anyway, I was thinking, because watch is the best time to do that, and I got inspired to write a poem. As I began writing though, something came over me, a feeling of absolute familiarity. I could not quite place it though, which got me brain storming, trying to figure it out. Not realizing that I was still writing until I was finished, I read what was on the paper. To my amazement, it was a recap of an encounter that happened not to long ago, though I pushed out of my head, the details were more vivid than at the time of the...reunion if you will. Written in the form of a poem, I'm not quite sure how poetic it really is. It seems to me, more of a story, or monologue. I just typed it the way that I wrote it. Here it is. You be the judge.


Deep within this shell of a man,
the child cries out.
Longing for that,
which he most desires.
Yet seems to be
incapable of attaining.
Answers to questions
he cannot find to ask.
Reconsiling that,
which he has never known.
The man leans on
his jet black pick-up.
More for support
than for comfort,
as though his trembling knees
may give way any minute
to the mass of the nervous fool.
"Hello" the hesitant
child within asked.
"Scotty? Is that you?"
Speaking to his father for
the first time since he was 8.
More than 17 years before.
How withered and frail
the old man sounded.
Hardly the gruff resonant
voice the boy inside recalled.
Had it been so long?
How time did blind side this
pitiful, decrepit man.
He thought.
Gaining confidence.
The young man reclaiming
his footing & sturdy visage.
"We're all great!"
Confidence & valor
coming full force now.
"Accomplished and successful in our endeavors!"
"I'm in the military, studying
to become a police officer.
then maybe a detective."
A wide grin appearing on his face
knowingly at his father's
distaste for the law.
At that moment the vigorous
man could not, nay, would not
be stopped.
The boy within dispelled.
Seeming as a distant memory
of days long past.
"My mother raised us well,
& ON HER OWN!"
There were no questions
the man needed answered.
He knew this now.
Only answers for him to give,
in the form of accusations.
The man said goodbye.
Knowing he never would,
nor would he ever want to,
speak to this old fool, ever again.
His half-sister,
(The illegitimate daughter
of his bastard father.)
And his aunt.
(Sister to the fool.)
Piled against the door to the house.
anxiety running through them
Like a mountain brook
In the spring time.
Fed by the melting snow.
He put the phone away and turned.
Starting for the waiting pair.
They were upon him he took on step.
"HOW'D IT GO?!?"
Tears rolling down their faces
as if in the middle of an April rain.
Responding with a wry
grin on his face.
"Well...it went well."

I'm cool and now have proof!

WOO HOO I'm no loser, no not me. I'm so cool that you can put your drinks on me to keep them chilled. This is how I know.

Title? I don't need no stinking' title!

The Smokers
written by Steve Martin



I was searching for monologues, trying to reminisce of my high school days, when I stumbled across this and though, I just have to post this. I know at least one of my readers will absolutely love it. This is not a monologue, per se, as there is no one speaking. But it is nevertheless hilarious and (to a small degree) a condemnation of the habit I am adamant about, though quitting. This is from Steve Martin's first published book, Cruel Shoes, entitled "The Smokers." It appears written on his first album, "Let's Get Small" (1971) accompanied by three images of a very young, dark-haired Steve Martin with several cigarettes in his mouth at once, looking comically suave)

Steve: He lit the cigarette and smoked it down to the filter in one breath. He silently thanked the cigarette company for being thoughtful enough about his health to include a filter to protect him. So he lit up another. This time he didn't exhale the squeaky-clean filtered smoke, but just let it nestle in his lungs, filing his body with that good menthol flavor. Some more smokers knocked on his door and they came in and all started smoking along with him.
"How wonderful it is that we're all smoking," he thought.
Everyone smoked and smoked and after they smoked they all talked about smoking and how nice it was that they were all smokers and then they smoked some more.
Smoke, smoke, smoke. They all sang "Smoke That Cigarette" and "Smoke Gets in Your Eyes." Then the smokers smoked one more cigarette and left him alone in his easy chair, about to relax and enjoy a nice quiet smoke. And then his lips fell off.

The best internet cartoon series since Strong Bad

I just had to put this here. So I was just surfing and stuff and stumbled across this, THE GREATEST INTERNET CARTOON SERIES SINCE STRONG BAD!!! You's guys should watch this. So go ahead and cut and paste this site onto your search bar. I think you'll enjoy it. By the way, if you saw this post before, this is not the same link that leads to the toilet humor episode. This one leads to the archive of ALL EPISODES. Anyway, check 'em out.

http://www.weebl.jolt.co.uk/archives.php

In a nutshell. or When's my early day?

Ever since I got to my new ship, it's been the same thing day in and day out. I got there hard charging, guns a roaring. I bust my as every single day. That make two of us, myself and GM3 Larkins. Oddly enough, I do less than I did on my last boat. The people in my division complain about having to do everything. Something as simple as sweeping a 20ft passageway that's only about 3ft wide. God forbid they have to do something that takes more than five or ten minutes. The point is they don't do shit, leaving Larkins and myself to take care of the entire workload. I have stayed an hour late after the rest of the division has been let go, to finish up on line items that had to be finished. Some times They might not even HAVE to be finished on that day, but could possibly get the guys out earlier on the next few days.

I am a Vertical Launch System technician. I work on the Mk41 launcher. We have the capability to launch a plethora of weapons like the TLAM,(Tomakawk Land Attack Missile) ASROCs, and SM-2 just to name a few. I have a critical job according to the navy. I've been onboard since February 18th of this year. I've worked on or in my launcher 4 or 5 times tops. I'm always do work else where to help out the division as a whole, because we also work with the 5" guys(Mk45 54caliber 5" Gun Mt[cannon])
They are the laziest bunch of Gunner's Mate's I have ever seen. They would die on my last boat. They are a disgrace to the title.

Last week, we have a change of command. Not six hours after our new Captain assumed command, he got that dreaded first call. Four of his crew had an incident out in town. Can you guess who three of those guys were? You might have guessed that they were from my division, if you did "You get a million gold stars". Well it seems that every time that it looks like we're going to get off early something pops up at the last minute. We had to go to training Thursdays morning at 0900 and we were told that we could go home after that. After training they said, "We can't go yet, the Captain wants the entire division at Captain's Mast." This is non-judicial punishment where Cpt. Is the judge and jury. (Evidence need not apply, accusation is good enough. De ja voeux. What about Salem Witch trials?)So anyway, we had to stay. Mast didn't start until 1300(1:00PM)and didn't end until 1445-1500(2:45-3:00). No early day that day. So I had to look forward to Friday, when the entire crew always gets off super early, like before noon. Don't get me wrong the division gets off early quite often, on the days that I have duty, in which case I have to stay on the boat and work and stand watches that are boring as hell until I get off of work the next day. So Friday rolls around and I though for sure that I would go home early. Main space fire drill, and training early in the morning, starting at 0600 ending at 0745. Woo hoo! I'm about to get off in a couple of hours right? WRONG! Divisional quarters at 1:30? What's this all about? So, 1:30 comes, the Chiefs and divisional Officers must inquire about what there people are doing on the weekend. Where they're going, who they're hanging out with, etc. The Cpt. decided that they would do this every Friday, because of the alcohol induced mishap out in town. I don't think that they realize that keeping the people on the boat longer will give them a stronger urge to go out and get a drink when at last, they finally do get out. Ah, Navy logic, you gotta love it. When do I get out early? Where is my break?

this is so recockulous

Ok, this doesn't make an sence at all, whatsoever. It was kind on amusing though.

Scott Alan Austin's Aliases

Your movie star name: Fruit Thomas

Your fashion designer name is Scott Moscow

Your socialite name is Scotty Potty Balboa, Panama

Your fly girl / guy name is S Aus

Your detective name is Dogs Putnam City Original

Your barfly name is Banana Jim Beam & Coke

Your soap opera name is Alan Sunset Drive

Your rock star name is Reeses Peanutbutter Cups Light

Your star wars name is Sco Ausdre

Your punk rock band name is The Calm Slinky

The Amazing Meganame Generator

Foamy the Squirrel!

http://www.illwillpress.com/hatta.html

You's guys gotsta watch shizzle fa rizzle. Its off the chain dawg.

Can't you dig these?

They're kinda fru fru with the girly pics, but I kinda like them. So which element are you?







Your element is earth: Wise, solitary, mysterious
and loving. You are very wise. Your wise as in
you know things others do not, you can see past
stereotypes and see the real people behind
their facades, and people will often come to
you for help and advice. Quite solitary and
somewhat shy around people because you prefer
animals and plants, animals aren't afraid to
show themselves or what they are feeling and
plants are fun to nurture. You are very strong
in your silence if you set your mind on
something you will often times pursue it to the
end. Sometimes you just want to get away, so
you seek refuge in the forest where you can
have time to think and try to sort out your
emotions. The sound of the wind usually calms
you, especially moving through the trees. Life
to you is something precious and should not be
taken for granted.

.:-What is your true element?-:. -With Anime Pictures and detailed answers-
brought to you by posted by Scotty @ 5:58 AM 0 comments